Quarantine Confessions Volume II

“I drank wine out of a coffee mug during my work zoom meeting”

“I ate an entire frozen pizza by myself, two nights in a row”

“I told my kids & hubby that I was going on a run, but I really sat in my car for 45 minutes”

“My armpit hair started to curl. I panicked and shaved today”

“I let my kids cry trying to find me playing hide and seek under a blanket for 22 minutes”

“I’ve purchased well over $300 worth of wine”

“I don’t tell my husband when our 2 month old sleeps through the night so I can continue to get some sort of sympathy from him for being tired”

“I have a stash of snacks in my closet, just for me”

“During a zoom call with my entire team, my son said ‘My dad is mean to my mom’ “

“I pretended my back hurt so I didn’t have to do dishes after dinner”

“My friends missed the Celine Dion concert, so I performed live on Zoom 3 margs deep”

“I’ve only washed my hair 3 times in the past month”

“I am tired of hearing my husband ask ‘What are we going to eat?’ I just want to grab a knife…”

“I have a timer to my son’s TV limit, but sometimes sneak over and change it”

“My husband asked me when the last time I showered was”

“I stay up way too late just to get time away from my husband”

“I picked the jellybean bag out of the trash to finish the bag”

“I put my airpods in and tell my family I’m listening to conference calls when I’m really listening to podcasts”

“I ate a box of Cheez-Its for lunch”

“I tell my husband I have video zoom calls so he takes the baby. I relax and drink coffee”

“I would give anything for my fiancé to go back to work”

“I peed with the bathroom door open at a park because I didn’t want to touch the handle”

“The only thing keeping me from drinking wine all day is my breastfeeding infant”

“I tried on my jeans the other day, they physically hurt”

“I’m pretty sure I was still drunk for my 9AM conf call today”

“I love working remotely so I don’t have to manage my annoying team in person”

“I take a bath twice a day, but I don’t remember the last time I washed my hair”

“I sneak boxes into my neighbor’s trash to hide my purchases from my husband”

“Ordered wax strips to wax my brows and pulled off half of my eyebrow”

“I was so bored, I tried rollerblading and tripped in the elevator and broke my elbow”

“I’m thriving in quarantine life”

“Accidentally ended a conference call with ‘Goodnight, I love you’ “

“I dyed my hair from blonde to dark brown & it looks black. My hairdresser is going to kill me”